“Hello, my name is April Thomas and I had bad eyebrows.” In fact, I’m sure I now belong to a society of former bad eyebrow folks. Like we all went through the intervention, the admission of guilt, the dedication to making a change… the whole multi step process and now we’re on the other side. Me and my former bad eyebrow pals are a club now and we own up to past mistakes.
Truth be told I had no idea. I mean in the 80s and 90s, we just left the house with the eyebrows we were given. I can actually hear all the under 40 people gasping in horror. “WHAT WERE THEY THINKING?!” Calm down. We knew enough to make sure we actually had 2 eyebrows and not 1. Oh, but there was that unfortunate season where people did pluck out their entire eyebrows, but I digress.
It’s like somewhere along the way someone or some group decided that eyebrows needed to be “done”. And who were these people? I mean, why do my eyebrows need to be shaped, tweezed, plucked, groomed, laminated, tinted or even pruned into tiny azalea bushes atop the eyes? Don’t get me wrong, I like makeup and looking my best as much as the next gal. I’m a girly girl. (In case you were confused by my obvious athletic gifts.) It’s just that eyebrows never used to be a thing. And now, apparently mine have been all sorts of wrong for years.
My friends Cara and Katie saved me. I’m proud to report that my eyebrows are now up to the current standard. I no longer have to wear a paper bag or hide out at home. I’m no longer causing unsuspecting pedestrians to stumble on the sidewalk as I pass by. It’s safe to walk the streets again fellow Lakelanders.
Oh and if you need eyebrow tips, I got you. 🙂
So do I have a point to this? I just thought it was hysterical. But did you know “eyebrows” (or brows) are mentioned at least 10 times in the Bible? Yea, me either. HA!